I often wonder how other families do everything they do?
There always seems to be one family who can keep their house clean, eat lovely meals, get great marks at school,play instruments, have lots of friends, play sports and have two careers. How do they do it all? Some days I think it is a miracle I just made it through the day. Most days there is a load of laundry waiting for me and a never ending stack of dishes. Try as I might, these ghosts from the day continue to haunt me.
Some weeks are better than others.
I feel like I have it all together, then the next can be a scramble from the moment I wake up. I am confused how other families get up hours earlier to prepare their kids for pre-care before the school day, work all day and come home to everything and an evening roster full of driving, activities and homework.
I have always guessed that something has got to give under such conditions. I know for me it does.
I seem to have such a sensitive barometer for too much.
I used to get sick or some strange pain would pop up to stop me in my tracks. Teaching me to learn (surprisingly not quickly) when I was overloaded. I suppose each of us has our threshold. Some of us drink too much, eat too much, yell too much or exersize too much just to cope. Some other people are built for speed, chaos or disorder. Can run on little sleep and are fuelled by life in the fast lane. I however have found that I am not naturally organized, get stressed in chaos and have had to work at bringing order to my life.
Early on as a parent, I remember reading a quote that said, "You can have it all, just not all at the same time."
That quote gave me a lot of freedom and the comfort to know that the train of life's opportunities would not sail past me. That I could relax knowing there would always be another train. That I could choose to get on and off when it best suited me, and that in fact pacing myself would serve me best in the long run.
I have to keep in mind that my life although relatively unbusy, continues to be very full.
I try to be very conscious of my choices, but honestly the world of a family has so many fast moving parts. Our children are all amazingly creative, resilient and ever changing and with that brings its daily requirements of meeting their needs as well as my own.
As a result, I am still very much a student of life and find many of my lessons hidden in in such challenges.
What I have come to appreciate in our apparent lack of activity going, instrument lessoning, and socializing is that we instead are not in a vacuum of doing nothing as I had feared, but instead have been choosing to make time together as a family in the evening a priority.
Some days it doesn't feel like much other than cleaning up, doing homework and a bit of tv. Usually we have time for baths, story time and cuddles on the couch. We are definitely not perfect, but seem to all respond well to time relaxing at the end of a long day.
Perhaps we are not missing out, but rather being nourished by an unbusy evening and time spent together.